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Feb 18, 2018
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Cheap Date: Wrestling Night at South Broadway Athletic Club

February 16th 01:02pm, 2012

In the early stages of a romance, common sense dictates a certain amount of fiction. With the honeymoon phase in full effect, inevitably you’re compelled to mask those undesirable traits that might put you out of your would-be partner’s good graces. It starts with making an effort to do the small things: open doors, make your own bed, floss your teeth more than twice a year. Suddenly your clothes are impeccable. Impossibly, your apartment floor is visible. Out of nowhere, you’ve become a non-smoking, amateur wine connoisseur with an eye for the finer things.

Living this brand of lie can get expensive. Happily, it can be effectively sidestepped before it even starts with one of the cheapest dates our fair city has to offer. Wrestling night at Soulard’s infamous South Broadway Athletic Club. There’s no better way to gauge a significant other’s humor, personality and long-term compatibility than by an evening of gritty, lowbrow, so-bad-it’s-good entertainment.

Some of the hottest in town, advance tickets at South Broadway are $7. For that, you get a night’s worth of chair-smashing, choke-slamming, pile-driving action in a fantastically dingy, church rectory setting, surrounded by a crowd who fails to see the problem with mullets and clashing camouflage tank tops. The bar (choking with cigarette fumes and straight out of your uncle’s basement) shells out pitchers of A-B products at $8 a pop (single cocktails are $3). Hot dogs ($1.50) are courtesy of the SBAC Ladies Auxiliary Club.

Expect at least one “Why are we here again?” After that, if your date still can’t appreciate the ambiance, cheap beer, trashy entertainment and junk food, it might be time to rethink your future.

Warning: Do not attempt this until you’ve been on a minimum of three prior dates. Also, you’ll need some friendly backup in the form of at least one other (good-humored) couple.

March 12 is the next match up.  Call now.

By Matt Berkley

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One Response to “Cheap Date: Wrestling Night at South Broadway Athletic Club”

  1. martha mcarthur Says:
    February 19th, 2012 at 11:58 am

    March 12 is a monday. Are you sure that’s the next date?

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