Frankenpizzas: 7 weirdly wonderful pies


We can only assume each of these monstrosities began in the heart of a hungry drunk, and we thank them.

1. The T-Rav Pie at The Sliced Pint
The ultimate St. Louis drunk food: This double-decker pie is stuffed with toasted ravioli filling. The second crust is adorned with your choice of toppings to solve the age-old, late-night dilemma: pizza or t-ravs?
1511 Washington Ave., St. Louis, 314.696.8787

2. Felix’s Baby Back Pie at Felix’s Pizza Pub
This 18-incher is topped with a half slab of ribs: Shredded rib meat, barbecue sauce and a sprinkle of dry rub join with mozzarella and are crowned with the final three bone-in ribs for good measure. It looks prehistoric.
6401 Clayton Ave., St. Louis, 314.645.6565

3. The Clayton at Felix’s Pizza Pub
Why choose between Thai and Italian? Coconut red curry replaces standard tomato sauce in this fusion pie, which is topped with chicken, lettuce, tomato, green onion and a deluge of jalapeno ranch sauce.
6401 Clayton Ave., St. Louis, 314.645.6565

 4. Cubano at Pi Pizzeria
Is it a sandwich or a pizza? Who cares when yellow mustard replaces tomato sauce and is layered with a healthy dose of Swiss cheese, savory slow-cooked pulled pork shoulder, country ham and dill pickle slices for a pie that satisfies all kinds of cravings.
Various locations.

5. Tim’s Breakfast Pizza Pie at Chris’ @ the Docket
Slathered in sausage gravy and topped with smoked cheddar, sunny side up eggs and broccolini, this pie stands out as exceptionally odd amongst its breakfast pizza compatriots.
100 N. Tucker Blvd., St. Louis, 314.977.4615

6. Vampire Slayer at Basso
This fancy Frankenpizza version of a sausage pie features shrimp sausage, Fresno chiles, salmoriglio (an Italian dressing made from lemon juice, garlic, oregano and olive oil) and garlic chips with a creamy fontina bechamel.
7036 Clayton Ave., St. Louis, 314.932.7820

 7. Spaghetti Pizza at Jonny’s Pizza & Pasta
This is exactly what it sounds like: just spaghetti noodles and a sweet house-made meat sauce on a hand-tossed crust with mozzarella cheese. The place isn’t called pizza or pasta, people.
4628 N. Illinois St., Fairview Heights, Illinois, 618.416.4464